Why I Ride

People have a multitude of reasons why they ride bikes. For that matter, reasons change with time. The reason that you start riding may well not be the reason that you continue riding. For me, I was always fascinated by bicycles. As a kid growing up in the middle of nowhere with few others directly nearby with which to play, I used the bicycle as my escape. I think that this is a common thread for so many of my generation, for the bicycle was their sole means of transit. We would amass in roving bands and plot trips throughout the local area. Competition quickly crept into the mix in the form of wheelie, long-jump and no hands riding. Feats of daring or more often, stupidity. Lack of skills coupled with inferior quality product and questionable engineering practices often lead to catastrophic failures.

Bicycles were also one of the very first objects of my desire, so to speak, that I can recall truly wanting for. I grew up very modestly and as such, bicycles and so many other non necessity items made their way to me as used or salvaged goods. To that end, there were very few in my neck of the woods who had the where with all to have much in the line of brand new and if they did, it was department or hardware store as there literally were no bike shops in Northeastern Vermont in those days.

I can't begin to convey the countless hours spent sourcing used parts from the few local hot bed stashes of bike parts and then cobbling together something to ride. The pure satisfaction of building up a viable form of transit from a collection of odd and dissimilar parts and pieces is something that stays with me to this very day. It is something that I still take great pleasure and satisfaction from and fully expect that I always will. There is a sense of accomplishment that one gets initially from the build but then from actually riding the bike that they built. The experience affords an escape like few others.

As much as bicycling historically helped define not only me but my generation, it has further become a major part of my life and with that, it has become a part of Cathy's as well. We are largely who we are today because of it. In many ways, it defines us. I like to think that we are better because of it and as such, we try to be good hosts and ambassadors to the sport that has given us so much.

This is why I ride bikes but there is also another reason why I ride, train and race with purpose that I do. I am one of the many people who has been totally changed by biking. As a kid I was always husky (that means fat). Growing up rural in a family that was not into recreational physical activity and didn't necessarily have the means, motivation or understanding to make really healthy nutritional choices set the stage. As such, I constantly battled with my weight, often being the biggest kid in my class as I was always tall as well as fat. This was the case right through my freshman year of high-school where I topped out at about 210# just about the same time my height maxed at 6'1". My sophomore year I started playing football. With that a change occurred, which got me started on the road of legitimate physical activity. I played football (poorly) through the rest of high-school as well as track and field in the spring. This got me to the point where I "looked normal" and got my weight in check at just over 190#, where it would hover through the remainder of high-school.

Unfortunately, this was not the end of the tale of the scale. It never is. College helped pack a solid 20# back on thanks to beer and unhealthy eating choices and quantities, despite remaining active with recreational running, hockey and racquetball. My freshman year I hit 216#, a new record, but one that would not be the ultimate plateau. No, that would be post college, when I started working and regular physical activity took a huge dip. I'd picked up tennis and loved to play though I wasn't very good, but the couple times a week that I could play just wasn't enough to do it. I climbed steadily to the point where I topped out at 236#. That was just about the time when I started getting into mountain biking in earnest. Though I'd owned a really nice TREK 950 MTB for a while, I hadn't really ridden it much. I was new to the area and didn't know all that many people.

This changed when I meet a couple of other folks at work who also rode bikes. Through that networking I learned of local places to ride. Yes, this was back in the days of finding information first hand, back before Google or the internet or even Cathy for that matter. Things are so much easier today as information is so easily accessible. Anyhow, we started riding the Middlesex Fells once a week and our work based ride group swelled. We learned of Lynn Woods and started riding there as well. Keep in mind, however, that the rides were not exactly high impact. We would ride really technical trails for a couple of hours and cover 5 or 6 miles. The hook was set though for what would be a lifestyle change.

Soon I met people who not only rode recreationally but raced as well. A couple of the crew learned of a mountain bike race on the Cape and we decided to give it a try. This was my first bicycle race ever, the Surf n' Dirt in Orleans, MA. I did the beginner race, which was only 5 miles. I remember being unable to fathom how the higher classes could do 10 or 20 miles; it simply did not seem possible to me at that point. I struggled mightily in that race just to finish and though that I was going to die. As you can see from the post race picture of all of me, there was some excess baggage. And yes, that is a full suspension TREK 9200 that I am stranding next to.

From there a few of us kept racing and I ended up getting hooked on it. The weight came off slowly and over time I managed to get back down closer to 210#. This would remain my core weight for some time. My fitness and stamina steadily improved as the amount of time I spent riding increased. I upgraded categories and continued racing for a number of years, always easily qualifying for the clydesdale class. My winter weight would shoot up to near 220# and the summer weight would be between 205-210#. Though it didn't seem like it at the time, I look back now at some of the pictures and am aghast. Over the course of the following few years we became disenchanted with racing bicycles and walked away from it, though we never stopped riding. Not for a minute.

Fast forward to the current epoch. This time-line started in and around 2006, when Cathy and I got back into racing bicycles. This time we had become well established in the cycling community and came at racing from a different avenue, from the road rather than offroad. That is a whole different ball game, is incredibly competitive and requires a much higher level of fitness just to hang. I remember meeting Johnny Mo' for the first time on a late winter/early spring, NEBC Saturday morning library ride. I was on a cyclocross bike that I'd built as an exploration and sight-seeing vehicle. We talked about cross and he set the idea of racing, an idea I'd toyed with since a brief and failed attempt back in the previous century. I also distinctly recall talking about weight and the fact that I was about 218# at the time. I can only imagine what he though.

That season Cathy and I would take up racing in earnest and race many road races, as well as weekly training time-trials. We also took up a full season of cyclocross in the fall. Add into the mix the constant riding and training and weight came off, paring me down below 200#. Despite the activity, my love of food and beer kept me right around that mark steadily. That is, until the competition bug sunk it's teeth a little deeper. I was finally starting to see some better results and like any addictive substance, I wanted more. This clear solution was to ride, race and train harder. I did and another weight hurdle was met, getting me to the 190# range. The final stage has only been in the past few years. Through some steady and consistent training, riding and racing as well as other activities like X-C skiing thrown in to keep it interesting, I've been able to hit the low 180# range in the summer and stay right around 190# in the winter. That is where I am now.

I'd really love to drop another level but find it difficult to balance. Again, my problem is my compulsiveness. The same thing that keeps me riding my bike is also working against me when I open the refrigerator or step into the pantry. I realize that and in truth, it scares the crap out of me. I know how easy it would be to get back to where I was and fear every day of inactivity risks a relapse. I honestly think of it that way, like it is an addiction.

I ride my bike because I love to ride my bike. I ride and race my bike with the level of conviction that I do because I'm always riding scared. Scared not necessarily as much of the competition though, as I am of myself.

Confidence

It really is amazing to see what a little dose of confidence can do. Some people just get into a rut and let their confidence and self image slip. In normal everyday life that self perception has certain connotations but in the world of athletics and competition it can have far more dramatic and damaging consequences. After all, the difference between a good and bad performance is often 100% mental and having a negative self perception or lack of confidence in your ability will inevitably become a self fulfilling prophecy. I know. Like most of us, I've certainly been there, though quietly I probably suffer from this complex less that most. I'm one of those people (fools) that chooses to ignore reality and regularly overestimate my athletic ability.

Last week we did our normal Tuesday night training ride. The ride, as I have mentioned before, is a road ride consisting of about a dozen sprint intervals, primarily on up-slopes. We regroup and recover in between the sprint intervals, each of which is between 20 seconds and a couple minutes long. This past week we had a feisty group and things got hot as soon as we hit the open road. The hammer-fest kicked in and soon we forgot about the recover portion of the show. It was pretty much just game on the whole night. Good stuff for sure.

Cathy racing Nashoba back in the previous century.

I mention this ride for one reason. Cathy decided to join, which she has in the past. She had been a little down on her results and her abilities, at least that was my take from the outside based on what I was seeing. In reality, I could see that she was not racing anywhere near her potential. When she wants to go, she can go. There are few women I know that can pull through at 25mph and bump the pace up, but she is one of them. If we get her climbing ability under control she would be deadly. I believe that is an easy fix as well, she just needs to want it and believe it; believing or more, knowing that she can climb. I honestly wish that I had half of the potential and natural ability that she does.

Anyhow, on the Tuesday training ride last week Cathy made a dramatic transformation. She got angry and she dug her heels in and she rode to her potential. What happened next was that she had no problems hanging on all but the longest and steepest sprints but she also started dropping some of the guys (no names mentioned). I could literally see her getting more and more confident as the ride went on. We had a great ride and the more important part was what happened this past weekend when it came time to race.

The old Surf n' Dirt race in Orleans.

That renewed confidence gained on Tuesday evening was still there come Saturday morning. Cathy raced better and stronger than she had all cyclocross season. She wasn't just sitting back and letting the competition dictate her race, she was driving her race. This resulted in a great result on Saturday. Sunday was looking even better, with a really strong performance going in a much tougher field. Unfortunately while sprinting hard to get on a wheel coming through for the lap she pulled out of her pedal and nearly crashed. The violent weight shift ended up tweaking the front wheel pretty badly, unbeknown to her at the time. Fortunately she managed to keep it upright and finished the race without loosing position but lost the other racer that she had been working together with all day.

This is one of the times where a carbon-fiber rimmed front wheel paid off as the incident simply stressed a bunch of the spokes causing the wheel to come out of true. However, the rim was rigid enough that it didn't collapse. An alloy rimmed wheel would have likely taco'd and collapsed, causing a catastrophic crash. Last night when we got home, I pulled the tubular tire off and trued the wheel up (internal spoke nipples) without issue. I glued the tire back on and all is set.

The point here is that racing is largely a mental game. Much of competition deals with your minds ability to get your body to suffer. If your head isn't in it, your body never will be either. Believe in yourself and the ability that you've shown to have. It's there, you just need to realize it and take advantage. How's that for motivation.

That Time of Year

Well it is officially "that time of year". The time of the year where, for me at least, everything starts to come into question. Overall fitness is usually at the core of the debate, but of course there is motivation and overall attitude which are all intertwined with environmental factors that we who call New England home, face on a daily basis. In reality, I usually have at least a few of these periods a year, depending on how things go.

Lets break this thing down and detail what I feel are some of the contributing factors in the equation. I think that starting with the obvious environmental factors is a good place to start. It's the fall and in reality, we just turned about at the corner for late fall. We all know what is right around the next bend. So what is the real issue with fall? After all, it is arguably the most beautiful and enjoyable season in the northeast. The bugs are gone, it is cool and crisp and the leaves, underbrush and poison ivy start to thin making for some excellent mountain biking conditions. What's not to love about that?

Nothing, except for the fact that I rarely get to ride the MTB in the fall any longer as it is rapid-fire no holds barred and non-stop cyclocross season from September through December. I think that it is one of the unfortunate truths about racing cyclocross, it wrecks the best season of the year in terms of being free and clear to just ride for fun. Take it as it is, that is just the trade-off that we all make when we get serious about racing bikes.

Along the environmental issue front, the bottom line is that this time of year in the northeast is dark and cold. The sun is setting by 5PM and by 5:30PM you need lights. With the setting sun, the temperature quickly plummets. This makes for cool to cold weather riding. Worse is the fact that the ride may start with reasonable temperatures but end significantly colder. You deal though. Besides, riding in the dark is sort of different and fun. The same old roads or trails seem fresh and new, primarily because you can't really see them all that well and you get a bit of tunnel-vision defined by the reach of your headlight. Most employed people also don't really have the luxury of riding during the day when it is light and warmer. Theoretically, I could bring all of my junk to work and then ride at lunch. This however poses enough issues that I'd just rather ride in the dark after I get home. When I'm an work I want to work, so that I can go home at a reasonable hour. I'm not a fan of extending the work day whenever I can avoid it.

I think that one of the most obvious yet difficult aspects of this point in the year, stems from the fact that I am really, really bad at training. Couple this with the fact that I'm not getting any younger and bang, I'm always effing tired. You can understand it earlier in the season when you are really ramped up on training and putting in the big time and mileage. However, at this point things have tapered down in prep for cyclocross, right? Well, for the smart bike racer yes, they have. They are into very targeted training sessions that fit with cyclocross efforts and race schedules. I too have cut back but realistically, not as much as I should. For instance, I'm spending between 8 and 11 hours a week on the bike. During the summer I spend more like 11 to 15 hours a week on a normal week and in the spring I'd average a little more. Why can't I pare it down some more? Simple, I'm a junkie and am addicted to the miles. I've tried to kick the habit but just can't see to make it work. That yearly total just keeps looming over my head and I certainly can't ride less this year than last year.

2008 Plymouth South cyclocross race.

It has been a long season of racing. As a master of really ineffective training, I tend to be one of those that has one peak in the season. It starts about May and ends about November. Graphically speaking, it's a very mature looking peak, if you think of it in geological terms. Much like the local New England hills and mountains, it has been worn and eroded by time into a choppy series of shallow ridges and valleys. There is some variation but the peaks are fairly low and the valleys are fairly high. This makes for little variation between off and on, which results in consistent mediocrity. It is indeed an ignorant man who knows not his flaws but it is a foolish man who chooses to ignore them.

Yep, I am what I am.

Addition Complete

The long awaited addition is finally complete. It was actually finished up a couple of weeks ago on Friday but things have been crazy. Immediately after completion and the final inspection, we promptly left for the weekend away in Maine and were not able to take advantage of it at all despite the nice weather. Last week the weather deteriorated and we all know the story of last weekend. Suffice to say, we haven't really had the opportunity to use it so far. Too bad as it is really, really nice.

New deck and 12x12' sun-room with removable glass/screen panels.

Now in terms of the new deck, obviously we make use of that. No we have not spent much time sitting out on it but we use it to get to the grill on a regular basis. Anyhow, it will be all set to go once we do get a bit of good weather or a nice sunny weekend afternoon when we are not racing bikes or doing chores. I can't want to just sit out in the room with a beer and enjoy it. Many thanks to our friend John who hooked us up with some very nice and nearly unused furniture for the room.

The first snow of the season on the new deck.

Next up is the internal lighting. I'd planned to get after it last weekend but the snowstorm changed all of that. The ceiling is vaulted and finished in tongue and groove pine. Cathy and I built two beams to span the width out of three ganged 2x6's that we glued and screwed and then ran through the thickness planer. That is always a fun time trying to run a 12' long beam through the planer on all four sides. We did the same thing for the mud-room addition that we did ourselves in Maine. After they are planed I dowel plug the countersink holes for the screws to make them look like they are pinned and to cover the heads of the screws. Ends up looking pretty nice. Those beams are actually semi structural though where as these are not really. The main use of the beams will be as carriers of the reflective lighting source, simple rope lights. We will string them on top of the beam and the light will reflect off the pine ceiling and give a nice glow. When it was wireds we had a switched outlet put at celiing level next to one of the beams to control the rope. Again, same as in Maine. Works well there so why change a good thing.

Weekend Fun

The weekend started out OK, with a the annual Canton cyclocross race Saturday. We arrived a little early to a nearly empty and desolate venue, which made us think that maybe we had slept through Saturday and it was Sunday, or possibly that it had been canceled. The truth was simply that the first race was at 9:30AM and not 8:30AM as Cathy had though. The race itself was pretty good with some course changes that dummied down some of the trickier sections. The changes gave the course a distinct power flavor, more so than before even. The dreaded run-up was also now a ride up based on a change to the entry.

Both Cathy and I had respectable rides on the day getting chances to really race with a group and both finishing in the same position on the day. Our friends and cyclocross rival couple, the Shattucks also oddly enough finished in the same position. Maybe we can make a couples tag-team match out of this except for the fact that Bill always beats me. We were also able to miss the incoming foul weather, which was a huge benefit, as it got down right miserable in a hurry Saturday afternoon.

We did have an issue with one of the members of our junior team (lets call him Crashy McFallsalot to abscond with a moniker concocted by the Mayor). The issue was that he crashed trying to hop the log that I had told him just before the race would be faster for him to run. Crashing is no strange occurrence for him as, I'm pretty sure, he has crashed just about every time he has been on a bike. To say that his bike handling is sub par is a bit of an understatement. Unfortunately what he lacks in skills he makes up for in short term strength and fearlessness. What this equates to is someone that ends up on the ground more than anyone I know. It also means he breaks a lot of equipment. Last Wednesday at cross practice he went just a little too hot around a corner and ended up plowing into a rock, denting the sin out of the Ksyrium SSL that I'd put on the bike I built for him. Ah, good times.

Speaking of weather, this past weekend was abnormally cold. Saturday made it into the low 40's early but then as the storm started to roll in, it clouded over and started to cool back down. By the time the rain started in the early afternoon it was slipping back into the upper 30's. The forecast was for a nor'easter storm that would start as rain but end in measurable snowfall. As it would end up, they were right for once. At about 5PM the rain started changing to snow and before long was just snow of the heavy and wet kind. This wasn't going to bode well given that most trees still had their leaves. At just about 8PM, we lost power. Saturday night seemed to have been punctuated by a lack of sleep. Sizzling electrical arcs and blinding flashes of light. No, it wasn't lightening, it was downed limbs striking live wires. Add to that the sound of cracking limbs and nervously rambunctious cats on an early AM tear and there was little rest for the weary.

When we finally dragged out in the AM to survey the damage and there was some for sure. It seems all of the surrounding trees dropped limbs into our yard. We had a number of big branches and entire limbs that were lost. A couple of hours work with the chainsaw and loppers cutting and blocking and then hauling slash to the back and we were done with that chore. The power company had trucks on the street first thing Sunday AM so we were all very hopeful. Hope waned when we realized that power was out on the main road as well as most of the town and much of Lexington as well. With that we looked at the powerless options for the day.

What we came up with for a way to kill some time was to pack up the arsenal and truck out to Harvard to sling some lead. getting there was a challenge with all of the downed trees and wires. The back road into the club was especially challenging as there were trees down over the narrow road which we had to squeeze under. The truck is a POS Toyota Tacoma 4WD though so I just ran it through the brush and slammed it over the limbs. reminded me of the old days of going hunting back in VT. The gate was up at the range but there were a bunch of trees down there as well.

We cleared a number of them off the roads so we could get through. Should have thrown the chainsaw in the back; not sure what I was thinking. I did have a small axe though so was able to gnaw my way through a nasty little oak tree in less than record time. We took the opportunity of having the range basically to ourselves to sight the AR in at 100 yards. I'd set it for 50 yards earlier as the 100 yard range always seems to be busy. Dial the elevation down a little a she was hitting right on target. Cathy and I ran a couple of pre-ban mags through it and then went to the 25 yard range to hit some plates with the 9mm. Well, we tried to hit some plates but mostly just missed. Typical. It's definitely a short range tool in my hands. On the way home we gassed up and snagged some coffee at Starbucks in Concord, which actually had power and was open, then headed back home.

Feeling the need to get out and do something, I thought a nice SSCX ride on the Minuteman Bikeway would be a safe alternatives. The public roadways were a mess of sloppy snow and downed wires, trees and brush so I really didn't want to be there. Unfortunately, the path in Lexington was a nightmare of downed trees making it virtually impassible. We turned back and cut off onto roads to connect to some conservation trails. There we found, as fully expected, more trees down. On some other back roads we made our way toward the Turning Mill section of town and saw the mother of all blockages. A bundle of three huge oak trees had uprooted and blocked the entire street. Fortunately we could cut through conservation land by the Estabrook School and Paint Mine to get into the PR at the power-lines. We picked our way through encountering lots more downed trees but it was good to just be out in the woods playing in the snow. Not much of a workout, at least from an aerobic standpoint and not a whole lot of miles but a good time.

Back home still no power and thus we settled in for the evening of huddling under lots of down. One thing occurs to me during power outages, which seem to be having with much greater regularity of recent. There isn't much of anything to do when it gets dark and there are no lights, no TV and no computers or connectivity. This I is a hard taste of old, when people went to bed early. This was because there literally was nothing to do without light. Today we are so dependent on electricity that this is only compounded. Sitting on the couch under a blanket with your toque and down coat on in the cold dark quickly loses its appeal. And as such, we went to bed at 8:30PM. Another night of poor sleep fretting about how to deal with the thought of a further prolonged power outage kept my mind racing.

I need to finally call about getting a wood stove insert for the ancient fireplace, which we wouldn't dare use for fear of burning the house down. I also need to look into generator options. In being out and about on bicycles I was amazed at the number of generators I heard running. I think that the general sense that the power is unreliable has convinced more and more people to go the backup generator route. I know we had been thinking about it but then held off. The main reason is that gas generators are problematic unless you diligently maintain them. Modern gasoline sucks and goes back very quickly, gumming up the carburetor and causing failing of the system when you finally go to use it. A natural gas system wired into the house is the way to go but the expense, I'm told, is crazy. Guess I need to weigh the options.

Group of three big oak trees blocking a side road in Lexington.

The bottom line I know is that we are fortunate. The power is back on for us now and so we have heat. We never lost hot water at all because we have public natural gas service. the cold was also a mixed blessing in that it allowed us to preserve the contents of the refrigerator and freezer by putting the perishable items in the cooler on the deck overnight where the temperature was in the low 20's. Many, many people are not so lucky. We really are lucky, in this and so many other ways. Hopefully some of the luck will bestow upon our friends still without power.